Okay, so like there was this guy…that thought he knew what he wanted.
Looking back on things, I guess I didn’t know what I wanted either. But if I must be biased about someone, I choose myself. So, I think that I did have a little bit more in mind of what I wanted than he did. He wasn’t really my type, but I had gotten past a lot of that type of stuff at the tender age of 19. If God said this was to be, then so be it. My mind would often think to Mary, the mother of Jesus, and how she obediently said yes to being the chosen woman that would bring forth the Son of God to the world. If I was chosen to be with this guy, then Amen! He was a confessed “Man of God”, and he had been fasting and praying that God would show him his wife, and God had revealed to him that his wife was me.
Now being the naïve young woman at the mature age of 19, if this Man of God said we were to be, then bless the Lordt. (yes, the letter t was placed purposely). I now didn’t have to be like the other young woman at school and wonder who my husband was. I no longer had to guess at who my Knight in Shining Armor would be. The only problem was that I had never prayed and fasted to ask God if brother-man was supposed to be my husband. After one year and a month of dating, he broke up with me for the one he cheated on me with.
During the “God said this, but I think I was wrong” phase of our lives, his words not mine, I was completely mortified. This all happened while attending a close knit, bubble of a private Christian university. People knew of our relationship and we had received prophetic word of our ministry together and yadda yadda yadda, so I could not understand for the life of me what happened to our love. I was embarrassed. I felt rejected and humiliated. I continued to believe God that he would come back, and Praise God he never did…Ro-Lo-Lo-Seeka-Locka-Sahda!
God is so good because he knows the plans that he has towards me. Thank you for keeping me when I didn’t want to be kept…I am just so thankful. Through an unexpected turn of events, God eventually showed me how my life with this person would have been. I was able to see that, that life was not the life for me. I am so glad God knows me better than I know myself. Thank you for ordering my steps even when I don’t realize that You are.
It’s so crazy because the year this guy was married, was the same year God opened my eyes to see who He truly had for me. Someone that had been by myside the entire time I was in the relationship of un-unh.
I hope after you read this that you will take away this message: God is good. Live your life, but pray about your life’s choices. Know that God is ordering your steps. There is no need to be anxious, worried, or stressed because in the end you will see it’s a waste of time and energy. God has your best in store for you. He will open your eyes to show you what to do next. You just have to trust Him. Amen, Amen.
One thought on “The Break Up”
I love your just Do it blog! I just been talking about it and dreaming about it but somewhere between those I forgot to do it. You really inspired me with your words. Thank you so much! Your words have recharged my hope in God!